Home Sweet Home!!! (10/21/10.....the day that does not seem to end....)

After total travel time of over 23 hours, our new, larger family finally made it home tonight in Nashville to a very warm welcome from our families and extended families from school.  After sitting on airplanes and in airports with strangers for that many hours, it was an awesome surprise to have such a welcoming party for us!  Thank you to the sweet friends from Murfreesboro and CPA that waited for an hour for us to arrive late in Nashville.  Another thank you for our families that came to pick us up and for all the support you have provided to us for this trip, for our heart for the orphans, and for 38+ years of raising us.

We rose in Hong Kong on 10/21 at 6:45 AM, which was really 10/20 at 5:45 PM at home.  The trip from Hong Kong to Newark was pretty rough, but not as bad as it could have been.  Mary Beth was glued to Jennifer the entire trip, and there was nothing I could do to help remedy the situation, as it was only Jennifer that she wanted.  (We are blessed that she has made the transfer to bonding with Jenn, her forever mother, from her foster mother for the past six months.)  Mary Beth did manage to sleep a bit on the plane, but not as much as she really needed to sleep.  Jenn and I did not get much sleep at all, and we felt it later this evening, as it was early morning in China.  However, I am writing this just before 0200 on the 22^nd, which is mid-afternoon in China, so we are still fairly wired.   But with 8 loads of laundry stacked in the laundry room, we can manage to get some of that done.

At least she managed a little sleep on the plane...

Luke is dying to get back to school tomorrow – on time.  He has completed all of his work and truly misses his friends and school.  So we hope to get our clock adjusted well to get him to school in the morning (a few hours from now).  We will check on Lauren and Devin, as Lauren was not feeling well, and Devin is just now getting to bed from some last minute items to complete.

But there is one comical note from the return that I do not want to forget.  A few weeks ago, Luke claimed to have seen a mouse in the boys’ bathroom upstairs.  We thought his eyes were playing tricks on us, and we shrugged it off.  How could a mouse get upstairs???  But as we were getting things straightened out for tomorrow, Jenn picked up one thing from the kitchen floor, and she noticed one “remnant” of a mouse on it.  I hoped that was not the case, and I again blew it off.  But a few minutes later, about midnight, I saw a gray mouse scamper down from the steps into the laundry room.  I quickly realized that we were out of mouse traps after catching the ones in the garage.  So I “ponied-up” and locked myself and the mouse in the laundry room, with the stack of clothes that he ran under.  I then threw clothes around every opening in the room that would allow him to escape and started tossing pieces of clothing around the room, hoping to uncover him.  (I was sweating the entire time……wondering why little mice make us sweat!!!)  As I got closer to the spot in the corner where I last saw him, he ran to the other side of the room, burying under one of the piles of clothes.  Well I am proud to say that after receiving one bruised heel, a stack of smashed dirty clothes, and one over-priced Wallabee school shoe that sealed the deal, the mouse lost the battle, and I erupted from the laundry room as the victor.  (Actually Jenn and Devin were laughing pretty hard at all my foot-stomping they heard from the room.  But nonetheless, this mouse was not going to make a mess any longer in our house.)

We then spent the next 20 minutes uncovering and throwing away all kinds of food in the pantry, as he took it over while we were gone.  It is a good thing the garbage man comes in the morning, as we filled up the can in one night.

Once we thought it was all done, and we could get closer to preparing for bed, I was taking out one more load when I heard “my damsel squeal in distress”.  (Actually she is not a damsel…..and I have never heard her squeal.  But she did let out a good “eek!”)  Junior mouse was hiding among the boxes on the floor of the pantry and ran out towards the boxes of food towards Jennifer.  This time he ran into the kitchen, and Devin and I managed to get him too…..with the same over-priced Wallabee.

 

So as the days get colder, the McKnight family will need to manage the uneaten food a little better, and we will need to invest in more $.50 mouse traps for the winter. 

Mary Beth seemed to enjoy her time at the house before putting herself in bed tonight.  So we are pleased that she has transitioned herself so well this quickly.  We know that as schedules get busy with school and activities, that we will have some separation issues, as someone will not be doting on her every second of the day.  So we will continue to solicit much-desired advice, guidance and Wisdom over the next few weeks and months.  But as a new friend from school reminded me tonight, our Father will never give us anything that we cannot handle without His guidance and lead.  Plus, when He calls us to step out and follow, He never promised the easy path……but one where He will lead our path. 

We are home to start this next journey.  Thanks to anyone that has followed it with us.  We have been blessed by your faithful hearts and prayers.

His Humble Servants

We will......We Will ROCK YOU!!!! (10/20/2010)

You sang it when you read it, didn’t you???  It’s ok to admit it.  (Devin was eavesdropping as I wrote this on the train, and he said that he did not sing it when he read it……and his nose grew 2 inches…)

Most who know me know that I am a simple person, and it does not take much to inspire me……even Queen.  I could hear this song playing in the gym at the hotel over my worship music in my earphones during my workout this morning.  Since it was a “ballad” when we were in our formative years, it was easy to sing, even if I was not focusing on it.  Later on, this song hit me when I was going over this current trip, as well as our future trip home.   So it inspired me to write a wrap-up to our incredible trip to China that we prayed and waited so long to occur.

The initial thought hit me as we were preparing for the day, and I was going over in my head what Mary Beth was going to process once she finally leaves her homeland and arrives in a strange place where most everyone looks like these new people that are her family.  Outside of the few faces at church and in school that are also from China, she will now be in the minority for the first time in her life.  We are preparing for her world to totally be rocked and turned upside down.  This is not a temporary trip like we just took.  This is something that she will have to get used to for the rest of her life…..or at least for her younger years if she follows her heart back to China or another country to serve her Father.  I know that if it was me, at my current age, I would be very fearful of the unknown.  We can only hope that her young heart either does not realize that this is so different from her prior home, since she is with us, or that she is just so young that it will not phase her.  Honestly, after knowing her for just over a week , I do not see where either of these options will fly, and she will enter a world that is very foreign to her, and she will really need to rely on her new family for comfort and security.  This does give us an opportunity to express to her the 13^th “lesson” that Paul wrote the 1st  time to the people in Corinth, and we will need to really prepare our other children for this.  We need to anticipate the worst for her as we get her to her new home, based on what we know of her intellect and personality.  I think the “spice” that so many Chinese have spoken of those in her province will come out – in both positive and negative instances.  We cannot go into this with blinders on (which I stay in that world most of the time), as she will have her big brown eyes opened in just a few days.  We will seek Wisdom and Guidance (James 1:5) over this transition for her – and us – as we get back into the real world.  We have faith that He will provide this to us, because it is a promise from our Father.

Speaking of her knowing her Father, we are getting her adjusted to our time of going to Him at meal times and at night before bed, in the hopes that she will soon learn by example to go to Him on her own soon.  She is bowing her head with us and closing her eyes when we do this together, even holding out BOTH hands for us to hold them with us.  PTL!!! 

Back to being rocked, this time it is me.  This place and this trip has again rocked my world for these little ones in China.  The trip to Jericho this summer in SE Asia was tough enough to swallow, as I wanted to stay.  But seeing these little ones daily, with their progress with their new families, has been totally inspiring and a downright blast for me.  Anyone that knows me, knows that I would rather hang out with younger people than adults most of the time.  (Big people are fun, but my passion is with the younger folks.)  I love talking with, coaching, teaching, and having fun with little kids, no matter the age.  But something about these little beautiful children and knowing that their future will be so much better than it was one week before gives me such encouragement.  (Actually as I am typing this on the train to Hong Kong, my little buddy Joe Joe crawled up in my lap to play.  He has two cleft palms, which means that he basically has two fingers on each hand, with no palm.  But he sure has some pinchers on there, and it does not phase him now that his hands are like this.)  It is little children like this that I will miss seeing and playing with every day on our trip.  I loved making them laugh and playing with them.  I would love to see what their future holds for them, having parents that love them and want the best for them.  These little ones are another highlight that I want to treasure from this trip.

Mrs. Gina is taking Jamison home to her daddy in Alabama

This little beauty is going home to Iowa

Sweet Jane loves her daddy and is heading to TX

Lexi is heading with her family to Philadelphia

I did learn last night that there was one adoption from the week that did not go through the completion process.  Our friend visited the orphanage yesterday and said she broke down when she saw this little 14-month old beauty.  I do not know the details of the “disruption” of this particular adoption.  But I just know that there is one little girl who was going to a home this past week that will have to wait a little longer.  It broke my heart as I stood on the street listening to this story.  I told my new friend that we were approved to bring two children home by immigration, and I would love to take her – just for the fact that it would be one less night for this child to spend another night in the orphanage.  Hopefully, she will be placed somewhere soon, and she will have an incredible future with a family that will give the love of the Father to her, as she is certainly deserving of it.

One unfortunate incident that occurred on the street today was that Mary Beth fell as she was running along the sidewalk and cobblestone streets.  Luke said that she was running back to me and tripped.  This may have been her first set of skinned knees…..and it will not be the last if she plans on keeping up with her brothers and sister.  But the one thing that stood out to me was that her left elbow was the one that was skinned when she tried to catch herself.  When you trip and fall, it is normally your palm that gets skinned up.  Why did she use her left arm to brace herself and not instinctively use her right hand to stop herself?  I doubt others find that interesting but me.  However, it is something I want to track and learn to have her answer.

On a good note about her left arm, it does not appear to phase her a bit now, and we hope and pray that continues to be a non-issue once we get home.  We know that being in a new place, it could cause some insecurities to arise.  However, we know that our family and friends will offer her encouragement as she gets to know them, and that those will be alleviated soon.

We are arriving in Hong Kong now and will all take a taxi to the hotel next to the airport.  That is one less hurdle to jump before coming home.  

Train ride to HK means we are getting closer!!!

Better Day for Last Day in GZ (10/19/2010)

My early morning run on the island was not enough to take away my jitters from how today would be after yesterday’s episode.  (We had one small issue with the word ‘no’ (or bu yao in Mandarin) as WeiWei went to bed last night too.)  But as she woke up, Mary Beth seemed to be fine, and we rocked along to breakfast.  But it was obvious that we would have to continue to stand firm in how she handled her actions and attitudes with us.

We were due to leave the island to go shopping with the Freeland’s after breakfast, but a migraine headache got the best of Jenn, and it put her back in bed for an hour.  So we did not leave the island, which was great with me personally.  But after an Excedrin Migraine and a short nap, Jenn was good to go, and we took off for some island shopping at these little local stores, which are great for souvenirs and good deals (if you like that sort of thing). 

One thing that Jenn reminded me was to get a few pictures of the island, so we could remember what this was like (in case we do not come back).  The island was a place for the Europeans to come a few decades back when the Chinese government wanted to separate them from the Chinese government.  So many of the buildings have a European flare to them, which adds a lot of the character to the island and makes it a resort spot.  Very few people live on this island, so many of the people travel onto the island from GZ or on ferry boats throughout the day.  There is a pretty good size private school here, which has drawn me each of the past couple of days as the children have arrived for the start of school.  I was itching to get into the school to work with and teach, as it was very infectious to hear the sounds of the children talking and excited for the day.  All in all, this part of the trip was definitely the highlight, with all of the families here of like-heart and the beautiful amenities offered to all on the island.  And who could leave off Lucy’s, as we spent all but one night dining there for the prices and the variety for the kids.

Street Park on Shamian Island

Shamian Island at Night

Taking a nap in G-Daddy's bed

After the afternoon of wandering the island shops, we came back to the hotel to read and relax before dinner.  Mary Beth took a nap in her favorite spot – GDaddy’s bed.  We love the fact that she knows when she is tired and takes care of putting herself to bed every time.  So we hope that this continues  during the day and at night once we get back home.

Waking up from my nap

I will say that I had round 2 with Mary Beth tonight.  I will not go into the details (as I try to forget these things).  But it was much shorter, and she was able to verbalize what was needed to resolve the situation much quicker this time.  PTL!!!  We hope that these battles will get shorter and shorter as we progress as Mary Beth’s parents.

I told GDaddy earlier today, as we watched her work and sleep that I would love to just have a look into one day in her past to see if that would tell me something of what makes her who she is – or who she has been.  WeiWei has defiant moments at times that we are not accustomed to having with our children.  It seems so easy for her to tell me or Jenn “bu” or “bu yao” (English NO) in times where we need her to respond to us differently.  To be honest, our children have never responded to us in this way.  I know we are blessed to have children like this.  But we hope that this was established early in their childhood……and we really pray that it will continue on into their “challenging years”.  It just seems too easy for Mary Beth to respond this way, and that will make it harder to break this action from almost five years of reacting this way.  But we know that with our Father’s guidance, it can be done.  As I was reminded last night in Paul’s letter to the people of Corinth, love will conquer anything.

To be honest, I could not help but get frustrated with what she has faced in the past 4+ years here.  Actually, I got downright mad tonight and was ready to chunk all of the Chinese words from her past and move on towards her future in our home and in the USA.  But I know that is not the best way to handle the situation, as we do want her to be able to still remember her country and where she came from.  So we would love to hear from others that have this same experience on how they conquered this battle, as we are not too proud to ask for help.

Playing Chinese hacky sack with my sister

To end the day, Jenn gave her a shower (which she now enjoys easily), and then she ran to the boys’ room to find me to brush her teeth.  I find it odd that brushing teeth was our first battle of the day, and we had a few “discussions” through the day, but she made sure that I brushed her teeth tonight.  Whew…..I can sleep more soundly knowing that.  Tomorrow is a new day, and we will see what blessings we can uncover as we head out of Guangzhou.

We did have a chance to meet another two “B’s” today and tonight on the island.  Luke and Devin find it very neat that we have met so many of these who follow the Word and are proud to tell others of their faith.  It is encouraging to hear of their faith.  I got my picture with one of these ladies tonight, but will refrain from placing it on the post for her security.  It’s a shame that we have to do this.

Paints with fingers, hands, and arms....12 hours a day

Jenn, the rock of the family, is of course rocking along and doing fabulous, keeping everyone in our family sane and moving forward.  She is awake tonight as I type, packing all of our stuff for the train ride to Hong Kong tomorrow, as well as for the flight home on Thursday.  Home!!!!!  Wo men Chom-gua (doubt I spelled that correct) means “We love China”.  But right now, we love getting back home and in our own beds……that actually move as you lie down in them.

Home in 2 days!!!!!  

Topsy-Turvy Monday – Physically and Emotionally (10/18/2010)

About four hours ago, I was completely mentally and physically drained, with absolutely no inspiration to write tonight.  A great celebration this afternoon at the US Consulate was hampered by our first TRUE tantrum that occurred before dinner, and it drained me with no words to share of the day.  However, our Luke capped off the night to give energy and inspiration to share our family and “Family” news of the day.

I have explained how odd we find it that after 3+ years of scrambling around for paperwork, staying up many nights completing documents and writing essays/autobiographies and updates and throwing $$ after express letters to get to places in time, we would have thought the final step that we had waited so long to occur would have had the same fanfare of all the work that went into the “chase”.   This morning was spent waiting next to the phone from 8:30-11:00 (10:39 to be exact) to make sure that the paperwork and documents sent to the US Consulate was accurate and could be approved.  Once our guide called us to let us know that we were approved, nine Non-Hague families from GWCA traveled to the US Consulate for the oath-taking ceremony.  First of all, every map we have seen on Sha-mian Island shows the US Consulate’s office right next to the White Swan.  As we arrived in the lobby, our guide said it was a 40 minute bus trip to the new office (of which will soon be located elsewhere).  So we had to scramble to make sure we had enough for a three hour trip, and the boys bagged the trip once they found out it was another bus ride.  The actual oath-taking ceremony was held with all the families in the waiting room standing at one time to get “sworn in”.  Once that occurred, we signed one final document and left.  Not a huge ordeal like I expected.  But you know?  After waiting with anxiousness to make sure we were ok, I will take the lackluster ceremony to just get my daughter home!!!!!! 

As I sat back this afternoon, I remember journaling just hours before we left with anticipation, looking forward to getting to China, like so many families across the globe.  Now there are about 50 rooms in this huge hotel that are counting the hours before they can leave for home!!!  Everyone is ready to leave, and our part is done.  We are NOW officially parents to Mary Beth LeWei McKnight.
The lady that spoke to us at the Consulate’s office asked if there were families who were on their 2nd and 3rd adoptions.  Lots of parents proudly raised their hands.  Bless them and their sacrifice.  It is so encouraging to us to see the parents and siblings all ready to give what they have to give life to a little child.  PTL!!!

Also one more thing for us to remember in the future.  Special needs adoptions are on the rise.  In 2008, 47% of Chinese adoptions were special needs.  The number rose to 57% in 2009 and 67% in 2010 thus far.  I have also heard that there are now many empty beds in orphanages across China for non-special needs children.  However, those with severe special needs are on the rise.  Our hearts go out to those in China and across the globe that are giving all they have to either care for or raise money to assist these little blessings to be raised with adequate care in the hopes of future adoptions.


On the way to the Consulate’s office, Mary Beth sat in my lap, and we worked on our English letters - trying to help expedite the process of getting her into a preschool soon.  We had a great time on the way.  Then as we were there, she was giving Jenn, Lauren and me kisses the whole time.   We were all in heaven, as Jenn and Lauren both wanted that time of bonding to occur more before we left her home country.  So overall it was a great trip.  Then…..we arrived at the hotel hungry and tired and….everything went south for us.

I recall writing the past few days of putting a caveat of “yet” of the issues that we had not experienced with Mary Beth that other parents were facing.  Well the “yet” is no longer, and we crossed that bridge tonight.  I am trying to forget the details of what started it, but it was something minor (but not to her obviously) that blew up.  Mary Beth has been repeating everything we have asked her to say to help her learn her English.  Today, she even gave me the hand signal of “I love you” with her right hand.  So she understands us well.  We asked her to say “Sorry daddy” and we could go on to dinner.  It was obvious by her eyes (not looking us in the eyes) that she knew she had done wrong and refused to say those words.  We knew that this was a crucial point, and we could not give in.  She knew what was going on, and we had to stand our ground.  Jenn said she would stay behind.  However, it was me that she needed to talk with, so I stayed behind.  During the next 60 minutes of crying, screaming, kicking, etc, etc, etc (get the drift), I calculated that if we accumulated the years of parenting by adding all three of our childrens’ ages together, we have 29 years of accumulated parenting under our belts (Chinese math…..).  During these years of parenting, I could combine all the fits of our first three children, and they would not have come close to what Mary Beth showed me during that hour.  Once we arrived at dinner, I told the kids that she said “Mama!” 462 times.  (If Jenn was worried about the bonding issue……she owes me dearly that I helped her cause tonight.  HA!)

During this time, I knew that she needed to know that I was here for her and that I would love her.  So I just held her as close as I could, caressed her back, arms and legs (when she was halfway still) and told her I loved her over and over.  I pray that she understood all of this and knows that her daddy is not going anywhere.

After going through an hour of all of this, I was able to get her to answer a couple of questions, and she finally repeated “sorry daddy” to me, and we reconciled.  We put our shoes back on, washed our hands and I carried her in my arms all the way to dinner (Lucy’s again….).  Actually I wanted to walk all the way around the island, so we could have more time together.  But she was great at dinner with all of us, and we know that we will have more of these, yet prayerfully diminishing in scope, over time.

As I reflect back on this, we – and all of the parents here with us – have to realize that we are battling so many things that are stuck in, hidden and locked away in the brains and hearts of each of these little ones.  It looks like Mary Beth is one of the oldest children being adopted, along some new friends from Philly that have a little beauty the same age.  (I actually passed them on the way to dinner and told them that they were my inspiration the prior hour, as I know that they have struggled with a lot of the same things with Lexie.)  That means that these older ones have more “baggage” that we have to filter through to have her get the past out of her.  She has been raised in at least three places (that we know of) in her 4+ years of life.  Very few of us reading or writing this ever faced that, if you think about it.  Now she is going into a family of people that do not look like her, cannot understand her, and do not discipline like anyone in her past.  I cannot say that I would not have reached my limit if I was in her shoes too.  So we will have a road to travel with Mary Beth as we bring her home and raise her as our child.  We are excited to let her know that we will love her and never leave or forsake her……just as our Father as done for us as His children.  (Big shoes to follow….)

Mary Beth works all the time

As I write this late at night, she just had another dream for the 2nd night in a row where she starts fussing, talking and violently kicking the covers.  I have to realize that she is just 8 days from her past, and she may have lots of nights like this before she closes part of her past for a more peaceful future.  We request prayers for all these little children as they look for peace, “faith, hope and love.  But the greatest of these is love”.

But to cap off the night, we bring Luke in as the closer for the day.  We have seen a lot of changes in Luke’s attitude lately if he does something that he sees is not as acceptable behavior in himself.  He will come up to either one or both of us and apologize for his heart not being right or for an action that he knew was wrong.  So we knew that he was going through a time of recognition and conviction of his heart.  We also knew that he knew “the right answers” if he was asked something about salvation, but had never mentioned something to us directly about it.  After a few minutes of Luke and Jennifer going missing for a few minutes tonight, she came out of the bathroom and told me that Luke wanted to talk to me about something.  So I went in there with him, and he told me that he had asked to receive Jesus as his Lord and Savior!!! Yes!!!!  PTL!!!!  That answer was worth every ounce of frustration and pain that occurred earlier in the day.  He and Jennifer had prayed for him to receive Jesus a few minutes before that.    We discussed that he knew that Jesus was tugging at him a few weeks earlier, but waited to ask until now.  What better place to ask – China!!!

I know that this week has made a difference for Luke, as he has asked a lot of questions about what other religions believe that are local to this area.  Plus, he has heard GDaddy meet a lot of people here that are “B’s” as well, and this has encouraged Luke in his faith.

What better way to reflect on this day than to know that we added one more to our family…..and one more of our family was added to HIS FAMILY!!!  We are blessed indeed.

Soli Deo Gloria!

My “Magic Arm” (10/17/2010)

I will explain this part after I run through our not-so-exhilarating day.

It was Sunday here, but not what we are used to experiencing on Sunday’s at home.  At breakfast, the attendees of this trade show here still had their name tags on and going to whatever meetings they are having in GZ.  As I ran early this morning, the streets on the other side of the island were similar to any other rush-hour traffic that we experience Monday-Friday each week.  This was one of the many reasons we are itching to start heading back home now…..and it is obvious that many other families are ready to get everything wrapped up to “head to the house” as well.  (As Luke told GDaddy yesterday, “We came to get our little sister.  We have her now, so let’s just go home.”  Love that sweet guy!)

Who is eating a healthier breakfast?

She can put away some food.

Mary Beth at breakfast

What do two fingers mean?

After breakfast we were scheduled to have the famous “red couch picture” with all of the babies.  Jenn and Debbie left breakfast early to try and hit the stores across the street for a deal on some of these silk dresses for the girls, but realized it was not worth the effort, as they could get a better deal somewhere else.  After 15 minutes of waiting for all 18+ families to get to the lobby, we confirmed that it was not worth it either.  It was one crying fest for 2-3 minutes while parents struggled to wrench little arms away to place them on a couch next to another crying baby for a picture that would “live forever in their hearts”…..not!  After a bunch of clicks from cameras in front of the couch, people started grabbing up all the babies before we brought the 2nd floor down for all the crying.  Mary Beth did ok though, even though she cannot be seen in the picture.  But I hid behind the couch, while she latched hold of my thumb, just to make sure I was still there. 

After that attempt, we all went to the mezzanine to get a huge family shot of the GWCA families that had traveled this week to adopt.  We have met so many neat families from across the world that have such interesting adoption journeys and struggles and success stories with their adopted children.  Our hearts go out to the many right now that are not sleeping or struggling with grieving and detachment issues.  Some families are enjoying the few minutes of peace each day when their little ones get so tired of screaming while they are gearing up for the next round……and they never know when it is going to hit.  I would love to keep up with these families, as we know that when the bond occurs, it will be a tremendous blessing for all the family.  We have been truly blessed in that Mary Beth has not had any of those issues – yet.  But as GDaddy and I have discussed many times in the past 6 days, we know something of her past is hidden deep in her brain, and that it will eventually need to come out.  We hope that we can show her our Father’s love in our love with her to know that she is forever with us and loved by us.

big ge ge is the coolest

We spent the afternoon swimming in the very cool pool.  My older bones were not crazy about getting in that cold water.  But I had six little arms (Lauren, Mary Beth and Jessica) pulling me in the water, and it was hard to turn them down for the fun. 

STOP is not in my vocabulary

COLD water but worth every second with 3 ladies

2 sweet friends

The evening was spent with Papa John’s Pizza (and yes, it tastes like home!)  in the hallway with the Freeland’s and some street shopping before turning in for the night.

Tomorrow is our appointment at the US Consulate, which this whole trip is based on this date.  Our GWCA guide spent much of the afternoon gathering and completing our paperwork to make sure that each of us had everything we needed before presenting it to the Consulate in the morning.  Our appointed time was 9:30, which we assumed would be an actual appointment in front of someone.  But it is actually that our guide will take everyone’s paperwork to the consulate at 8:30 to make sure that all the paperwork is ok.  They need one person to hang out in the room from 8:30 until around 10:00 to make sure that if we receive a call for questions that someone was there to answer the question.  If we do not get a phone call, then all is well.  Interesting…..but we will take it.  If  all goes well, all the parents will go to the Consulate’s office tomorrow at 2:30 pm to say as a group that we will be the best parents as possible to this child and leave.  Sounds like that will work.  I will let you know how it goes.

I know that our Father gives me a snippet of His message each day to give me encouragement.  I got that message late tonight, as we were getting off the elevator on our floor.

I have really been impressed that Mary Beth has gotten so much more confident in showing her arm in public – a much improved confidence over a 6-day period.  She now wears short sleeves, a bathing suit and is not afraid to let others see her use it actively in public.  Today as we were playing in the pool, she was letting me and Luke hold her right hand and left elbow to help her jump up and down steps.  I had the privilege of holding her left elbow as she jumped.  And to be honest, it was a weird feeling in her arm.  You could tell it was not like the upper portion of her right arm, as it was very soft and felt brittle.  It was like she had the skin to make a complete arm, yet did not have the bone structure to complete it.  This may be common for those with ABS, especially in the younger years.

We have also noticed that Mary Beth is very particular when she takes care of her left arm.  When we have her wash her hands, she will completely douse her left arm in soap to make sure it is as clean (or cleaner) than her right hand.  I cannot figure it out…..as we are used to watching the boys wash their hands with one on the faucet as the other makes a swipe across the stream of water to show that they are “wet”.  What makes (or has made) her be so protective of her arm when she either takes care of it or uses it to do something, which she does very well?  We look forward to learning more about her peculiarities as we get closer to having real conversations with her.  As of now, when she wants to tell us off or tell us what she thinks, she rattles off something in Chinese – knowing that we do not have a clue what she is saying.

I did feel very bad about her arm tonight before dinner.  The other girls were doing the game where they will climb up your legs while holding your hands and then flip over and land on their feet.  Mary Beth was not about to not do that – hand or no hand.  So I encouraged it and had Lauren show her how to use her feet to climb up my legs and torso.  However, something went badly wrong, as her left arm twisted wrong, and she went down quickly and was crying.  Actually as I picked her up, she could not catch her breath, she was crying so hard.  I knew that I hurt her and felt about 6 inches tall.  Fortunately, after about 30seconds of crying, she hopped back down on the floor and wanted to start flipping again.  Resilient!  (And I did redeem myself to do it correctly the next time!)  But as I watched her arm over the next few minutes, I saw some red marks show up on the outside of it that looked like little blood blisters.  They looked bad, and when she put some hand cleanser on that part of her arm, it was obvious it hurt.  Nice dad moment, right!!!   It reminds me that she will grow up tough in our family, but we still need to be careful in how we handle it while her little body forms.

As we were getting off the elevator for the final time tonight, two ladies popped on, with one holding a little boy in her arms.  The other lady immediately spoke up and said, “Look!  She has a magic arm too!!”  Magic arm…..never thought of it that way.  (The way the Chinese adults look at her, it is obvious they do not see it as magical.)  But this new mom obviously sees that her little boy – which has the same exact “blessing” on his left arm as Mary Beth – as having an arm that will create lots of magic in his life.  We also look forward to seeing what gifts she has been given with her talents that she has been given by her Father.

We also see WeiWei’s arm as magical in that if she had not been born with this beautiful, tender, magical arm, we would not be here now – teaching her to love, seeing her jump, laugh and smile, and watching her sleep peacefully as I write.  We hope to encourage her to be strong in her gifts and not see them as something to be ashamed of.

May we all go back to the promise and comfort written to each of us in Psalm 139:13-14.

The White Man hath taken over the Island!!! (10/16/2010)

What a difference a night’s sleep makes!  We woke up and there were people everywhere this morning!  Some large trade show is going on that has started in Guangzhou that has brought people and languages from all over the globe to fill up the lobbies and extra spaces.  But the best part was all the moms, dads, siblings and little Chinese children that were in the dining area that now have the hope and possibilities of a much brighter future.  They were running around, carried on hips, strap-on carriers or pushed in strollers.  But man, they were all over the place – crying, laughing, eating, throwing food, etc.  It was a blast seeing all of the proud parents walking around, and it really did not matter to anyone there if the children were quiet and behaving or throwing a complete temper-tantrum (as these little guys can really throw them!) because everyone of them is in a better situation than they were five days ago.  PTL for all these mom’s and dad’s that we are meeting!  We are truly blessed to be part of this “fraternity” and “band of brothers and sisters”!  This is a club that I am not ashamed to say that we are a part of going forward.

Today was one of our longer days that are scheduled for the trip – the dreaded medical exam!  We started out walking from the lobby to the clinic at 10:45 this morning.  After a quick visit to a small office for her VISA photo, we stood in line at the clinic.  As I described it a couple of days ago, this is a decent size clinic, but with little room for waiting on a doctor.  So it does resemble a clinic in the middle of flu season.  But now all these doctors and nurses were handling these little ones for the last time in their country.  We were fortunate to be a non-Hague family (please don’t ask me what all of that means when I get home…..’cause I still don’t understand all of it….) and we had the opportunity to opt out of vaccinations for this visit.  Whew!!!!  We have “pledged” to the government that we will have Mary Beth immunized in the states within 30 days of bringing her home.  No problem.  That is a no-brainer for us.  However, we felt so sorry for so many of these little ones.  One little boy had to receive 9 shots today!  I have no idea where they stuck him, because he was just an itty-bitty guy to get stuck so many times.  The dad said it took 3 people to hold him down.  The poor mom looked worse than the little boy when they came out.  He had the famous dum-dum sucker in his mouth to make him feel better.  She needed something a little stronger than that, I think…..

Jenn took Mary Beth to her office visits, while Brian and I managed the older girls, so they would not jump 10 feet out of the office to get hit by the taxis that were flying by…..as they will NOT slow down for pedestrians over here.  (It is difficult to explain that to these US children.  But anyone who has visited China can relate to this part of their culture.)  Outside of her left arm (which was pretty obvious to us too….), Jenn said the doctor said she had a heart murmur, which threw us off a bit.  We did not expect that because it was not reported to us on her original report we received.  We were a little concerned at first.  But to be honest, I am not that smart and I really do not know that means and did not think about it again.  I guess it could have been a lot worse, as we have heard of many issues in the past with other families where the original medical diagnosis was not accurate for their adopted child.  But I immediately thought of a couple of promising aspects for Mary Beth.  Would I rather have a heart murmur and spend my life having someone in Fuling handle it……or live within a 30 minute drive to the best cardiologists in the country???  Gee…..that was easy, and we can check that one off the list of concerns for Mary Beth as far as it goes for me.  Plus, even this doctor said she could grow out of it.  So we will let The Healer place His hand on her, so she can know Who is getting credit for any healing that will occur in her body.  We do not know if she would get that opportunity to understand that here.  So our odds are good with taking her home in this condition.  (I mean, can it be any worse than when she hits 12-13 years old and she is a pre-teen?!?!?  At least her new mama and daddy appear smart now…..)

After the three-and-a-half hour ordeal of the clinic, we made it back to the hotel for playtime with new friends in the playroom and with the Freeland’s.  We sure missed them and were glad to get Lauren and Jessica back together.  Olivia, their newest daughter, is such a doll!  She is 18 months old and has a cleft lip, but adapting so well.  Up until this week, the little one had never had anything besides milk/formula, not even rice cereal.  So the first bite of food that they gave her was the first in her life.  So far, “all systems are clear” for her as she is enjoying to eat now.

Tonight ended with yet another visit to Lucy’s Café with the Freeland’s.  We know that we are safe there, as everyone has something they can eat.  Jenn and I are itching to eat Thai or Cantonese on the island.  But we may have to wait until we get back home, as we know it will not be well received by the majority in the family.

Tomorrow starts out with a group photo on the famous “long, red couch” in one of the lobbies at the White Swan where all the Chinese children are supposed to be dressed in their silk Chinese outfits…..of which we have not purchased yet.  So if we cannot get to one of the stores early, she may be wearing her new clothes from the USA that have been given to us.  Either way, Mary Beth will be in the picture wearing something she did not own 6 days before, and that is all that matters.  After the picture, we are due to do some touring in Guangzhou and go to some temple.  IF we go, we will report how it goes.  But it will be Sunday……and we miss our place that we get to visit and worship at each Sunday, and we look forward to some of that “Fellowship” next week when we return home!

GDaddy and I had some good conversations the past couple of days on a couple of topics that I need some Word time and some jogging time to consider before posting.   Eyes are opened when we step out of our own world and when we invest in others.  I am learning this more and more these days, as I have spent many of my 41 years with closed eyes.  I need to seek Wisdom before sharing more, as I need to firmly believe and understand it myself before beseeching anyone else to do something I am not willing to do.

Jenn and I thank each and every one who is sharing this time with us.  Dwight is keeping us posted on a little of the activity of the blog, and we are blessed by your words of encouragement.  As one new dad wore a shirt today, the expression on the front of his shirt is our thought and reminder for us……

It’s not about me……